Surrender and Grace to Step Aside

"Get out of the Way" and "Step aside."
These 2 simple commands echoed loudly and assuredly in my spirit this morning as I showered.

I had just found out that my brother lost another job. He called my friend in a cry for help and they had been talking when I awoke (I praise God for this, because last night I was battling and interceding for Dan, feeling a strong need to do so). Dan's mind is beginning to unravel. During that conversation he expressed about wanting to die and that I hate him (despite all that I have done and tried to do). He doesn't know what to do and the little things, again, that my friend suggested were met with resistance.

Earlier this week, on Monday, I sensed something had happened. Dan was working somewhere nearby my place of employment and I didn't see his car there that morning (the second time since he started that job 2 weeks ago).

That evening during my weekly time of prayer at church, I prayed mostly for Dan, surrendering him to God. I was led to the book of Daniel to read the story of King Nebudchanezeer. The King was prideful and arrogant in regards to the source of his kingdom, thinking all he had was because of his effort. God warned King Nebud against pride through a dream, which Daniel interpreted. King Nebud did not like the interpretation... a short time later he continued in his arrogance and the dream came true. God cursed King Nebud and gave him over to insanity and a reprobate mind for 7 years. He was eventually restored after humbling himself before God during which he acknowledged that God was the High King of Heaven and Earth and that all King Nebud had done and accomplished and all his greatness was due to God giving him the means to accomplish that.

Like King Nebud, my brother suffers from the same pride. While he is not a king nor does he have many possessions, he suffers from the negative (flip side) of such pride: Charging God and others with wrongdoing, unfairness, and that no one cares. He thinks he needs to figure everything out himself and isn't willing to humble himself to ask for help or to be helped.

I believe the Holy Spirit led me to this story to show me what is going to happen with Dan. His mind is starting to unravel. I wouldn't want this to happen to anyone and far be it from me to make it happen. Like Jesus' mother Mary, who "treasured in her heart" those prophecies and things that were spoken of Jesus, this is how I approach visions, dreams, and words God gives me. I treasure them in my heart.

The last 2 years of trying to help him in various ways have been a long beginning to this moment. I do not regret doing what I have done: allowing him to stay in my home twice, asking him to leave both times because he couldn't stay sober, providing him financial assistance throughout. I learned much about myself and what I needed (for safety) in my living space and have learned how really to work with and help broken people (including myself). And when to step away.

I am confident that I need to stand resolute in surrendering Dan to Jesus. And so I end with the words that began this post.

"Get out of the Way!" I am giving room for God to fully be God to Dan and have His way with this broken heart. I recognize that my efforts have, unfortunately, led to this: that he cannot see I love him. He says I do and have done nothing for him. Maybe the part that is true is I have gotten in the way. No longer. I cannot be the agent of grace in his life.

"Step aside." For another to come by his side. For another to speak into his brokenness. For another to show mercy and grace and speak truth in a way, hopefully, that he can receive it.

The word from Daniel about the King is actually one of hope. The King was restored after he humbled himself. So I fix hope in my heart, the kind that does not disappoint because it is rooted in faith that the Son of God will be true to His word. Amen!